2012 is one of the worst movies I've seen in a LONG time. Normally I like really bad movies (National Treasure-type movies), but this was pretty awful. Oh John Cusack, what has happened to you? First of all, I refuse to believe ANYTHING that happened: a decrepit camper outruns volcanic lava and flying fireballs, a tiny twin-engine plane outflies the resulting giant ash cloud, and because the landing gear on a jumbo jet is damaged (when they fly from California to CHINA), the intrepid heroes get in a bentley, lower the ramp, and drive off the ramp onto a glacier. And they survive! Also, people seem to be able to use cell phones willy nilly (I REFUSE to believe that cell phone towers are still working when the San Andreas fault basically explodes and tips Los Angeles into the pacific. I barely get cell service in non-apocalyptic times). Also, satellite images are apparently still flawless? Now to be fair, I don't know a lot about satellites, but if the entirety of the earth's crust has shifted so that the north pole is in Wisconsin, don't you think that would have some sort of impact on the satellites? The close-up effects are...so bad I can barely stand it. Um 2002 called, they want their effects back? But it's even worse than 2002 because the Matrix was 1999 and that was awesome.
Also, this happens:
This is some guy's reaction to the ark almost crashing into a glacier. METHOD ACTOR. I really believed the giant ark that a fraction of the population is on and that almost capsized because a single cable blocked the mechanism that closed the doors was about to crash into the side of Mt. Everest. Here is his reaction when they don't die (SHOCKING):
WHERE IS THIS GUY'S OSCAR.
The movie does bring up one interesting issue of what we (as a world) should do faced with this kind of catastrophe: do a lottery to determine who will repopulate the earth, or sell tickets onto the arks (1 billion euro a seat) in order to finance the project while also hand-picking the "perfect" group of people needed to create a strong gene pool? FASCINATING. Not the "gripping interpersonal tale" that Aubrey snarked that it would be, but interesting. Thinking about that distracted me from the horror of the effects and acting.
Moral of the story: watch Moon. I don't need to talk it up because if you don't watch it, you're missing out. Here's all I'll say: music by Clint Mansell (of Requiem for a Dream fame), amazing acting by Sam Rockwell, and makes you think without hitting you over the head with moral messages or anything. It is just...SO WELL DONE.
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